Fractured Family

“Are we almost there, Papa?”

Roxanne and her two siblings, Randolph and Rebecca, had been following their papa on the longest walk of their lives. Granted, they’d never really gone on a walk before. But still, it felt like even as the landscape changed around them from ragged rocks to river flats to sprawling savanna, Kyrien always had a different destination in mind. For three newly-mobile hatchlings, it was infuriating and exhausting.

“We’ll be there soon, Roxanne,” Kyrien said.

Rebecca threw her head back and groaned. “But, Papa, you keep saying that!”

“And why didn’t Mama come with us?” Randolph asked.

Kyrien was much taller than them and walking in front, so it was hard to see his face. Still, Roxanne swore his steps slowed for just a moment whenever they brought up their mama, Jolene. Roxanne and her siblings all missed her, but she refused to come with them when they’d left their rocky hatching-place a few days ago. She’d said goodbye and wished them luck, but they’d never been away from her before. Kyrien led them out of the cave as soon as they were big enough to make the journey; they hadn’t had time to explore or get into trouble at home yet.

But Roxanne did remember seeing her parents arguing more and more before they split up.

“Because this is a special trip, just for us,” Kyrien said. “We’re gonna meet the rest of my family—that makes them your family, too.”

“More family?” Roxanne wondered aloud. “What are they like, Papa? Do they glow?” She was the only one out of them that had glowing stripes, and she’d always wondered why.

“Sorry, Roxanne, but none of them glow like you do. It’s been a while since I saw them… There’s Vanim, the oldest of us. Then his two daughters, Fainel and Frasil. They should be fully-grown by now, but the last time I saw them, they were still juveniles…” He trailed off, lost in his thoughts.

So Kyrien must have left his own family at some point, too. Did everyone split from their family when they were little? He seemed so sad when he thought of them, but if they were going back to them now, maybe that meant that Roxanne would be able to see her mama again someday, when she was big and tall and impressive like papa.

“But what about your parents?” Randolph asked.

“I never knew my parents. Kyrien found me when I hatched, and…” He laughed. “Then I guess I just followed him around!”

“So Vanim’s not your papa?”

“Of course not!”

“Aw,” said Roxanne. “I wanted a grandpapa.”

“Uh, I guess you could call him that, if you really wanted. I don’t think he would mind.”

“We have a grandpapa!” Roxanne hopped excitedly.

Randolph pushed her out of the way so that he could be closest to their papa. “Do we get a grandmama, too?”

“As far as I know, no. But maybe that’s changed now. Fainel and Frasil’s mother took one of their siblings, but the two of them stayed with Vanim.”

“Why didn’t we get split up, like they did?”

Kyrien looked down at them, his deep blue eyes brimming and bittersweet. “You wouldn’t let me and your mama split you up if we tried! The two of us agreed that I would take all three of you.”

“But why couldn’t Mama come with us?” asked Rebecca, this time jostling Randolph out of the way. “Then we could all meet Vanim and Fainel and Frasil together! And be the biggest, bestest family ever!”

Kyrien’s gaze hardened, and he set his sights on the far horizon. “Stop asking about her! She’s not coming with us, and that’s the end of it.”

The three siblings shared nervous looks. Their papa had never snapped at them like that before. It made Roxanne feel like her already insular world had shrunken even further; just a few days ago, it had been her, her siblings, and her mama and papa; then she lost her mama; and now it felt like her papa was leaving, too.

She didn’t have time to dwell on it, though, because Kyrien’s much longer legs had carried him far ahead of the worried hatchlings.

“Hurry up, you three!”

“Coming, Papa!”

#

That night, the group had settled in the savanna to sleep, under the relative shelter of an acacia tree. For Roxanne, their spot was much too exposed. She’d hatched and grown up in a cave, surrounded by sheer rock on all but one side, and the shade of sprawling branches just wasn’t the same, especially when her yellow stripes glowed brightly in the empty darkness of nighttime, where anyone could see her.

She had trouble sleeping. Everything was changing too fast, and her mind wouldn’t settle. Rebecca had seemingly pushed their spat with Kyrien as far out of her mind as she could manage, and fell asleep against their papa’s snout. But Randolph had been sulky all day, and unnaturally quiet. They were both laying closer to Kyrien’s feet.

“Randolph? Are you awake?”

Randolph turned his head minutely, and she caught his pale pink eyes. “Yeah.”

She inched closer to him. “Do you think Papa’s mama and papa glowed?” Roxanne whispered to him. She had a feeling Kyrien wouldn’t want to hear her.

“Maybe they had a pretty red crest, like mine.” He was using the voice he used when he was trying to be funny, but the light of Roxanne’s stripes revealed he wasn’t smiling at all.

“But that could be from Mama’s papa, too. She never told us about him.”

“True.” He glanced at Kyrien, still sleeping soundly, with Rebecca curled up next to his nose. “Why do our parents hate talking about their parents so much?”

“I don’t know. But doesn’t it feel bad to not want to think about your family? We’ve only ever had each other. I can’t imagine…”

“Mama stayed behind,” he said bitterly. “We were the ones that left, but she abandoned us.”

“We don’t know why she did it. I’m sure she had a good reason.”

Randolph looked away, towards Rebecca and Kyrien again. “At least you’re actually wondering why. I don’t think Rebecca’s going to do it again.”

Roxanne wondered if that was really so bad. She wished she would stop thinking about it! But she couldn’t get the events of the day, and all their ugly implications, out of her head.

“Roxanne.”

“Yeah?”

“Let’s try to get some sleep. I’m sure Papa will have us running around again in the morning.”

Roxanne felt a tiny smile tugging at her lips. “Good idea.”

She rested her head on his shoulder and breathed deeply.

“Ugh, it’s so hard to sleep with you around. You glow too bright.”

“You’re the one that said we should try to sleep!” She giggled, noticing that he wasn’t exactly trying to shove her off. In fact, she felt his tail curling up against her back.

At least, for now, they had each other, in their little fractured family.